


Don’t

by Wannawannabe



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Implied Child Abuse, M/M, also it’s never explicitly said that he was abused rip, it gets softer at the end if that makes you feel better?, mmmmmmmmmm, sorry if you can’t tell akshdh, there’s a big argument but it’s never described in detail, uhhhhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2018-08-31
Packaged: 2019-07-01 12:31:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15774177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wannawannabe/pseuds/Wannawannabe
Summary: Woojin heard the voices rise, he tapped his foot faster.It would be over soon.He’d be fine.It was just an argument.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Rip me y’all

Woojin rolled his eyes as he watched Chan and Jisung continue arguing. At this point they’d been arguing for so long Woojin had almost forgotten what it was about. Changbin had given up five minutes ago, deciding Chan and Jisung were too worthy of opponents for his side to ever win. The rest of the members had given up trying to get them to stop some time ago, all now on their phones or having left the room. When 3racha argued they all knew they just had to wait for it to die out. They may be some of the closest friends but boy did they have the biggest arguments. 

Woojin tuned back into the argument as Jisung took another step closer to Chan. When had they stood up? Woojin glances at Chan’s laptop, open behind him, the screen still on despite Chan not having touched it since the argument started. Woojin began tapping his fingers against the arm of his chair. This was normal, he told himself, people always argued, no use getting worked up about it. 

He met eyes with Hyunjin, he looked tired of this argument. Woojin tried to remember what it was about, trying to ignore Jisung and Chan’s rising voices, the obvious anger Chan was trying to hold back. Woojin took a deep breath, everyone got angry from time to time, even Chan. Chan didn’t blow up, neither did Jisung. People argued all the time he told himself again, a comfort he had gotten used to telling himself over the years. Hyunjin looked over at the arguing pair then back at Woojin and rolled his eyes. Woojin forced a small smile, trying to show he was sick of it too. Though he was sure they had different reasons. 

Hyunjin nodded towards the door signifying he was going to leave. Woojin nodded in approval, when Chan was busy he knew they turned to him for permission to do things. His eyes quickly shifted back to Chan as Hyunjin got up to leave. He had gotten closer to Jisung, both voices raised even more so than before. Another minute, Woojin told himself, another minute of this and then he would try to end it. 

He felt Jeongin lean against him, a small whine coming from him as his rested against his shoulder. Woojin took another breath, a disgusting sense of deja vu washing over him, having been like Jeongin before, in a different context, a different time, an actual blood related brother being there for him to lay against. 

“Why are they so mad?” Jeongin whispered, his voice small, almost as if he was getting frightened. Woojin clenched and unclenched his fists, Chan and Jisung’s angry voices growing more and more prominent in his head. People argued all the time, he told himself again, the comfort decreasing the more he told himself it, the longer this argument went on. He took another breath, Jeongin was more important than his own old fears.

“You know how they get sometimes, they all want this album to be perfect, it’s just a build up of stress. It’ll be over soon,” he comforted, attempting to keep his voice level. This shouldn’t affect him as much as it was, he was being silly. He was a grown man, an adult, he hadn’t been the scared child he once was in years, hadn’t seen his parents in years. He felt Jeongin nod against his shoulder, reaching to grasp the sleeve of shirt and nuzzle further into him. “You can leave if you want,” he offered. Jeongin was still so young and this argument was getting to the point he might have to get their management team if he wasn’t able to break it up. 

“I think I’ll stay another few minutes,” jeongin responded quietly. Woojin nodded, there went his chance to leave. Not that he would have, but leaving with Jeongin had been a nice thought. He looked around the room, at this point only He, Jeongin, Changbin, and Felix remained in the room. Felix was leaning against Changbin much like Jeongin was against him. He looked increasingly troubled as he watched two of his closest friends continue to argue. Changbin looked considerably more tired than he had when he had backed out of the argument. 

“It’d be better to add his part at the end!” Woojin heard Jisung yell, as he tuned back into the argument. That was right, his part. They were arguing about where his part would fit best. A small voice in the back of his head whispered  _ they’re arguing because of you _ , he pushed it into the back of his mind. He hadn’t heard that voice in a while. He watched as Chan clenched his fists. 

“Jisung, I thought we  _ all _ agreed to have it in the beginning,  _ two weeks ago _ ,” Chan grit out. Woojin could feel him trying to hold down his anger. Woojin tapped his fingers a bit faster, nervous energy building. He tried to calm down, nothing was wrong, he had watched these two and Changbin argue about music all the time, people in general argued all the time. He felt Jeongin grip his sleeve a bit harder. He began tapping his foot. 

“Guys-“ Changbin tried, obviously sick of this argument and sick of watching Felix get more and more upset. Unfortunately he was immediately cut off by Jisung.

“That doesn’t mean we can’t  _ change _ it! We’ve changed things before!” Jisung continued, ignoring Changbin’s annoyed huff, “plus it sounds better!” He yelled, throwing his hands up in the air in annoyance. Chan’s back was to Woojin, but he could still imagine the annoyance on Chan’s face.

Chan let out an annoyed sigh and Woojin felt his breath catch. He had heard that sigh so many times, had that sigh directed at him, at his  _ brother _ , so many times. He felt Jeongin sit up and look at him. Could see his head tilt in concern out of the corner of his eye. 

“Hyung?” He heard Jeongin ask and Woojin definitely needed to respond to make sure he didn’t worry. Instead he watched as Chan took a deep breath and clenched and unclenched his fists and Woojin was suddenly all too aware of every movement Chan was making and just how close he was to Jisung and how young and small Jisung was. Then Chan’s hand was suddenly moving and-

Woojin was across the room before he really knew what he was doing.

“ _ Don’t,”  _ he breathed out, now holding Chan’s wrist in a death grip. Chan and Jisung turned to him in surprise, their argument fizzling out. Woojin looked at where his hand was holding Chan’s wrist, his hand shaking. Woojin dropped Chan’s hand like it had burned him, realizing what he had just done. He looked back up at Chan who reached out for him, a concerned look in his eyes. Woojin backed away, he couldn’t do this right now, didn’t want to think about the implications of what he just did.

So he ran. 

Maybe not his best plan but he needed  _ out _ , and need out  _ soon _ . So when he turned around and sprinted out the door he wasn’t exactly thinking about what he was doing or where he was going. He reached the end of the hall, desperately pushing the button for the elevator. He heard a door open and turned to see Chan run out of the practice room, they made eye contact, for a second, everything froze. Woojin was aware of his breathing, the fact he was breathing as if he had just ran a marathon, could see Chan’s chest moving too, see the deep breaths he was taking, they stared at each other.

Then he sprinted for the stairs. 

“Woojin!” He heard Chan call as he rushed down the steps. “Woojin wait!” He heard again, already a floor down. He was  _ not _ doing this, not today, probably not ever. He could hear Chan on the stairs now, but he was almost on the ground floor, there was no way Chan could catch up with him.

“Woojin!” He heard again, accompanied by a loud slam. Woojin looked up, seeing Chan a floor farther down than he was earlier, Woojin’s mouth dropped. Did he just  _ vault _ over the stair railing? As Chan got ready to do it again Woojin realized he had to leave before Chan caught up with him. He kept running, one flight left, then he’d be out. 

He reached for his mask, it probably wouldn’t help much but it was better than just sprinting bare faced into the ground floor cafe. He hoped no fans were there right now, it was unlikely considering how often Felix visited and how much the fans hoped to see them, but he could hope. 

As he struggled to put on his mask he finally reached the last door to exit out into the ground floor, he would be out and go… well go somewhere. Anywhere but here, he hadn’t visited some of his friends in a while, maybe he could pop in. He reached for the door, mask in place-

Then gasped as he felt someone pull on the back of his shirt. The person spun him around and pinned his arms to his sides. Woojin looked at Chan, now right in front of him, eyes serious. 

“Woojin,” Chan repeated, voice low. Woojin looked away, he had been  _ so close _ . Why was he so  _ dumb _ ? Why couldn’t he just have controlled himself? He didn’t even know why it had happened! He had watched people argue so many times, especially 3racha. Especially Chan! God he had  _ grabbed  _ him! What had he been  _ thinking _ ! Chan would never hit anyone, especially not Jisung. He couldn’t understand why he had freaked out, he wasn’t a kid anymore. He was an adult, he hadn’t been that helpless kid at home in  _ so long, _ why did he have to ruin everything? 

“Please don’t,” Woojin whispered, slumping against Chan, accepting his defeat. Maybe Chan would let him drop it, let them pretend it never happened because it would never happen again. Woojin would never let it happen again. He rested his forehead on Chan’s shoulder, letting himself feel Chan’s warmth seep into him, when had he gotten so tired? He felt Chan hold him tighter, their embrace becoming more of a hug instead of an entrapment.

“We’re going to the dorms,” Chan said softly, rubbing Woojin’s back. Woojin grimaced, looks like he wasn’t getting out of it. “I’m texting Sungie and we’ll go out the back and get a cab okay?” Chan asked, moving back a bit to lift Woojin’s face. “We’ll talk there,” Woojin nodded. There was no use fighting it now.

 

It was time to go home.


	2. I’ll Still (Love You)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :’) (if the next thing I post isn’t finishing the Changlix fic someone come snipe me with an ask)

Woojin wasn’t sure when he had fallen asleep. One second he was in a cab with Chan on their way to the dorms and next thing he knew he was in his bed. He slowly got up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. How long had he been asleep? He looked out the window, gasping as he realized it was now dark out. Had he really been asleep that long? He must’ve missed so much practice, they had already begun learning choreography for their next comeback he would have to catch up so much-

“I can hear you thinking from here,” a voice said. Woojin turned towards the door, seeing Chan leaning against the door frame, a small smile on his lips. Woojin tensed as Chan started walking towards him, remembering the events of earlier. Chan would want to talk. The chances of getting out of this were very, very, low.

He looked away as Chan sat next to him. He knew what was next, he had helped Chan figure out ways to get all the boys to talk to them when they needed to vent, when they needed help. He didn’t want the pity he knew would be in Chan’s eyes. Didn’t want him to use the Voice he had made just for situations like this. Didn’t want to hear the sad tone he had heard from so many other people, from all the people who knew but couldn’t help, from his teachers who had begun to question why the bags under his eyes had gotten so much  _ worse  _ towards the end of the year. He didn’t want to talk, he didn’t want what he knew was going to come, he didn’t  _ want- _

Woojin gasped as he felt two arms suddenly wrap themselves around him. He felt Chan rest his head in the crook of his neck and squeeze harder. Woojin looked down, confused.

“Chan what are you doing?” Woojin asked, giggling as Chan squeezed him harder. What was this? Why was Chan doing this?

“I’m squeezing the sadness away,” came Chan’s muffled response, head still resting in the crook of Woojin’s neck. Woojin giggled at the absurdity of this. Chan squeezed harder yet again, it wasn’t too tight yet but Woojin wasn’t sure how long Chan would keep doing this. “See?” Chan continued after Woojin had finished giggling, “it’s working.” 

Woojin rolled his eyes as Chan squeezed again then slightly loosened his grip. Woojin wasn’t sure why he expected anything else from Chan. He knew Woojin wouldn’t want something he’d probably heard a million times before. Woojin smiled a bit down at Chan, who was still hugging him. Woojin had to admit this was... a new approach to talking to him about this topic. He felt Chan shift and start pushing him towards a wall, and move more onto the bed. Woojin raised an eyebrow,

“Chan?” He asked. Chan kept pushing and re adjusted his arms.

“It was too hard to hug you like that, this is easier,” Chan explained, going back to his hug. Woojin rolled his eyes again. Chan was warm, and it felt nice to lay like this, but Woojin knew he couldn’t keep avoiding the elephant in the room. He took a breath,

“I’m not sure what you want me to say,” he started. It was a half truth, obviously Chan wanted an explanation, but how could he explain it to him? How without changing how Chan would see him? Treat him? He didn’t want anything to change. He had been fine before and he was fine now. It was a one time thing. It wouldn’t happen again. Ever. Chan sighed.

“You…,” Chan started, then took another breath, “You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to,” Woojin sighed in relief. “But,” Chan continued looking up at him, “can you answer one question for me?” Woojin, looked away, “Please?” Chan continued.

“....maybe,” Woojin decided. Chan nodded. Then shifted so he was looking straight at Woojin now.

 

“Did you think I was going to hit Jisung?”

 

Woojin looked away. The look Chan was giving Woojin was completely serious. Woojin knew he could not answer, or he could lie but… He couldn’t lie to Chan. Not about this. 

“Yes…” he responded, not sure what to expect. He heard Chan sigh, and he tensed, ready for…  _ something _ to happen. Not quite sure what. 

“Okay…” Chan said, resting his head back on Woojin. “Okay,” he repeated, quieter this time. He squeezed Woojin a bit more, and then briskly pulled Woojin onto his chest so that they were both laying down on the bed. 

“You’re awfully grabby today,” Woojin commented, trying to break the silence that had fallen over them. Chan grunted and quickly squeezed Woojin again, and okay this was getting a little tight.

“Have to make sure there’s no sadness left,” Came Chan’s muffled reply, squeezing again.

“Yeah well there’s not going to be any sadness if I can’t  _ breathe _ ,” Woojin gasped out, pushing away from Chan, who let go with a pout. He rolled off him, and stared at the ceiling. They sat there for a while, laying next to each other. Woojin felt a hand grasp his, intertwining their fingers. 

“I…” Chan started, obviously hesitant, “I can’t promise you nothing will change if you tell me about what happened in the practice room,” Woojin tensed a bit, he thought they had dropped this. “I can’t promise that the way I act towards you won't change,” Chan continued. “Which, honestly, sucks a bit. But I-” Chan glanced at him, quickly turning away when their eyes met. “I can promise…” Chan took a breath and squeezed Woojin’s hand in his, “I can promise any change will only be positive?” Woojin glanced back at him in confusion, “I can promise that no matter what, it would stay between you and me. I can promise that it wouldn’t change how I think of you. I can promise that you’d still always be the amazing, kind, talented, wonderful person you are to me. I can promise all it’d do is make me think of you way more than I already do, which is honestly saying something because I think about you a  _ lot _ ” Chan continued, obviously getting a little flustered. 

“Chan-” Woojin tried, not quite understanding what Chan was implying.

“ _ Please _ let me say this. If I don’t say it now I’ll never say it and I’m not sure where this confidence is from or that I’ll ever have it again,” Chan interrupted. Woojin stared at him,

“Okay…” Woojin replied, more confused than ever. Chan nodded in gratitude. 

“I can promise that I’ll never leave you,” Chan stated, staring a hole into the ceiling. Woojin’s mouth dropped.  _ What? _ “I can promise that I’ll still bother you after practice, and watch one piece with you, and make you watch other shows I like, and send you dumb jokes at 1 am, and go to bed when you scold me for being up so late, and praise your amazing voice, and buy you your favorite snacks during midnight snack runs, and complain about how unfair it is that we work out the same amount but you still beat me in arm wrestles, that you haven’t even been cooking that long and the kids still prefer your cooking to mine. That your flicks are way scarier than I’ve ever been, and I can promise that I’ll still-” Chan faltered, his gaze leaving the ceiling, meeting Woojin’s eyes, who had begun staring at him in the middle. Was Woojin crying? “I can promise I’ll still…” Chan trailed off again, eyes moving back to the ceiling. 

“Chan…” Woojin breathed out, not sure what to say.

“I guess I can’t promise that nothing will change,” Chan restated, “But I  _ can  _ promise so many other things, even if you don’t tell me, that’s okay, but just tell me you know that you can come to me whenever you need something and... and I’ll be happy.” 

Woojin stared. No one had ever said anything along those lines to him. No one had ever looked him in the eye and said they’ll never leave him without it causing so much  _ dread _ . But here Chan was, still staring a hole in the ceiling, squeezing Woojin’s hand in his own, ears red. 

“Chan I…” Woojin trailed off, not sure where to go from there. What did this mean? Was this Chan trying to show support? Was it just a sign of their friendship? Was Chan trying to tell him something more? 

But looking at Chan now, and thinking about how  _ long _ he’d kept this bottled up. How much he trusted Chan. How much he finally just wanted someone to  _ know _ , even if it meant a bit of change. Woojin decided he could figure that out another time. So for the first time,

Woojin talked. 

And talked. And didn’t stop talking until the first 16 years of his life were completely described in horrifying detail, and he was sobbing into Chan’s chest as he felt Chan softly rub circles into his back and run his hands through his hair. 

That’s how they fell asleep, Woojin laying on Chan’s chest with Chan’s arms wrapped around him. And if Felix walked in the next morning to check on them, let’s just say he left with a few blackmail pictures on Chan. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is,,,, really cheesy I’m sorry ajsjahs I can’t write angst for this :((( so sorry if y’all wanted that. I know I left a lot vague too so feel free to send me an ask or dm me on Twitter if y’all want any questions answered! 
> 
> Also!!! Idk if this is a thing people do but I’m dedicating this fic to @mag-i-cal on tumblr! Idk her archive acc so I’m just writing it here! She’s so nice and is a great person to talk to and be around! <3 I hope she has a great school year this year and hope y’all send her good vibes too!!!
> 
> Once again thank you for reading and I hoped you liked it! I’m sorry if it was too cheesy akshajshsh

**Author's Note:**

> Mmm I’m sorry I didn’t finish the changlix thing writers block killed me and I rather have something out than nothing, I’ll finish it soon tho UwU also sorry I didn’t edit it yet ajskghd I might write fluff for Woojin at another time but I probs won’t write them talking it out because,,,,,, no thx  
> Feel free to follow me on  
> tumblr @channieroo  
> Twitter @chancharoo  
> I love new people and would love some friends ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡


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